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What do y'all think of this? My husband and I have been together since I was 13, I am now 19 and he is 21. We got married 2 months ago. We never really have sex. I was watching The Steve Wilkos show today and a 17 year old was married and hasn't had sex with her husband in 8 months and Steve said himself that its not normal for a guy my husbands age to not want sex. I love the way my husband makes me feel when we do have sex. I caught him masturbating in the bathroom more then 10 times. I please him in every which way possible. I rarely get the pleasure back. In the past two months, I've gotten laid probably 4 times. We haven't went on our honeymoon due to being broke. We consummated our marriage a month after we got married. That's bad. I dunno what to do. I get adult movies to turn him on or look up free lesbian porn sites (He loves blond lesbians) or I put on sexy outfits that I've bought in order for him to want to have sex with me. He either looks at me and laughs or he gets a little bit horny and looks at me in the eyes and says ''I'm not in the mood'' but will go in the bathroom when he thinks I'm sleeping and go on porn sites and have fun from there by himself. I wear make up and wear clean, nice fitting, smelling good clothes. I'm not a bad looking person. I love making myself pretty or hot. Everywhere I go, I have other guys hitting on me and my husband becomes an a ss when others hit on me but when he looks at other females and I say something about it, I'm in the wrong. I used to live with a stripper a few years back while he was in iraq and I learned a bunch of moves and dances from her. They just seem to never work. His Facebook is stocked with really pretty girls or his ex girlfriends and he has no pictures of us on any of his profiles but has 164 picture of other girls and him laying in the same bed or her sitting on his lap or in a car like face to face, Not even wedding pictures of us Am I really that ugly??. Almost all of my Facebook status's are about him, I tagged him or say his name or something. He has no problems saying he loves other females but he has nothing to do with me on his Facebook except being friends and the relationship thing and he's got that blocked. I dunno what to do anymore. I've tried everything. He doesn't always last long in bed either when we do have sex but he last 20 to 30 minutes when he masturbates?!?! We don't have any guys as of yet, because in order to his guys, you have to have sex first. Can anybody help? I will give Facebook info secretly if you wanna see what I look like but I need help on how to make him want to have sex with me. I love him and do not wanna leave him, so please no divorce him answers, I'm just looking for advice to help him last longer and also to help him want sex from me instead of his hand. Thanks | Here's what I get from what you wrote. You do everything you can to please him. And he rarely or never does anything to sexually please you.
Sex is not supposed to be selfish. You give and receive; you share your bodies; you do not take from each other, you give.
What he has to do is start focusing on (a) making time for you and you alone. Put the porn aside, and just start talking about the things that turn BOTH of you on, not just him and his blond lesbian porn. (b) Show him how to get you off so you will actually orgasm. Make sure he gets you off first for once, so he can see how much you actually get out of it, and how much it means to you.
Once he's done that for you, that is focus on your sexual needs, intimacy with you and finds ways to get you off -- don't worry, he'll get off on watching you get off.
The idea is when you're both giving each other pleasure, its making love. If its just you getting off and using your spouse to do that, its called being selfish.
The reason why he masturbates as much as he does is that he figures why bother trying? But the reality is, if he knows its special to you and he turns you on and does it for you, he ought to relish sharing in your orgasms.
Honestly that's the difference. |
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